Posts tagged funny

Question : Funny or Not Early Retirement Due to the financial situation, management are going to implement a scheme to?
put workers on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE, retire aged personnel early
Persons selected to be RAPED can apply for the SHAFT scheme, special help after full termination. Persons who have been raped & shafted will be reviewed for the SCREW scheme, scheme for retired early worker.
A person may be RAPED only once, SHAFTED twice, & SCREWED as many times as management deems apropriate.
Persons who have been RAPED can apply to get AIDS, additional income for dependants or spouse, or HERPES half earnings for retired personnel early severance,
Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the management.
Persons staying on will receive as much SH1T, special high intensity training, as posible, managment has always prided itself for the amount of SH1T it gives to its staff. Should you feel that you dont receive enough SH1T please bring it to your managers atention they have been trained to give you all the SH1T u can handle
financial management training

Best answer:

Answer by strawbcat
I love this – thanks for posting it!